Knowing Who You Are in Your Career

By Khamaria Wright

I started out in the counseling field at 22 years old. I’ve always been told that I have a gift for working with people and helping others. I would say that I’m a natural born helper.

Right after I completed graduate school, I felt very ambitious and was ready to help change lives one person at a time. Once I started applying for jobs in my field, I realized that the process wasn’t all “flowers and roses.” I went on three interviews and got rejected by all three, until I got my dream job. This was frustrating for me because I all three interviews were for a company I interned for a year and a half. I thought because I was a dedicated intern, had a great reputation, and because they knew my work ethic, that they would hire me.

When I went on the first two interviews I was told I wasn’t “qualified” for the position because I didn’t have enough experience. My first thought was “how do I get experience if you won’t hire me”. The last interview I went on I started to feel rejection. That baffled me because I felt like my work ethic spoke for itself. After that frustrating experience, I remember crying to my mom and saying, “I thought they liked me as an intern. Why won’t they pick me? Am I not good enough?”. My mother told me that it wasn’t me, it’s just that God has something better for me.

When I finally got the position at my “dream job”, I felt like I had to prove to my colleagues that I was worthy of having this job. I started people pleasing, “walking on egg shells”, and didn’t really trust anyone in my department (except for) my mentors that helped me get through my internship. I also felt very insecure because I was the youngest counselor in my department. I was afraid that they all looked down on me and assumed that I didn’t know much.

During this difficult phase I couldn’t fully utilize my gift of helping others because I was so preoccupied with proving that I was worthy and that I belonged. It wasn’t until I had a coworker tell me, “Khamaria you’re so smart and you work for a great company. Don’t you ever think that age is something that’s working against you because you are well respected here”. It was from that moment that I gained clarity about how my own insecurities as a 24-year-old, African-American woman (being a minority in the workplace was another thing I felt) started to over shadow the great work that I did.

After facing these experiences, I realized that I am the only one who can define who I am. I realized that these experiences were used as lessons to help me evolve into the woman that I am today. At 27 years old, I am now setting boundaries in the work place, and I have more confidence. I strive to do my best each day to learn and grow in my career no matter what others may think.

Stay tuned for Knowing Who You are in relation to Health and Body